Sad SAAC Jesse: Hairy Situation

Here is my continuing series of finishing old challenges in reverse alphabetical order.

Whoa, this one is sort of current-ish I guess. It is covered with hair.


More painter.

Sad SAAC Jesse: Houla Ghoula? What?

Here is my continuing series of finishing old challenges in reverse alphabetical order.

And this is a wikkid old one. So old. So very old. Which means it being a dead guy makes sense. He would have been full of life if this had been done on time, and then it also would not have been topical, which is better, because topical is for creams, not art.


More painter'ing. And way more brown that it needs to be, whoops.

Sad SAAC Jesse: Pirates! (and pants)

Here is my continuing series of finishing old challenges in reverse alphabetical order.

Today's image is: Pirate Pants. Or in my case: A Pirate Pants. Or maybe Panting Pirate. Or whatever.


You can tell he is a pirate by the ear ring. And because I told you.

Painter.

Sad SAAC Jesse: Rainbows!

I am going to try an finish all the SAACs I skipped. I am also going to try and keep them all under 3 hours. I am also going take a sip of water.

These will be in roughly, reverse alphabetical order. Starting with my most hated subject: Rainbows. I tapped into my glory days of being a teenager and making lots of pictures of clowns. Though, this doesn't look like those. No sir. Whatever.


Painter. Roughly an hour. Roughly .5 headaches. and one slightly cramped hand. Oh, and a background worthy of vomit. My gift to all of you.

Hey, a kittie, how timely.

So, I just happened to be commissioned to paint a cat at the same time there is a cat related SAAC challenge. Some planets must be aligned or something.... Anyway, here it is, my first ever cat painting:

8x10, acrylic on canvas.

The cat is my friend's cat Billie Boots. I painted that goddamn fur 3 times.

Some Big Teeth...

Maybe you know I have a side project, well not really 'side' since it's all I do (and I am still falling way behind), called some tiny teeth, where I paint, among other things, lots of people with tiny, ineffectual teeth. Now, by rights, I should just paint some more tiny teeth, since they are easy, but now, I decided to give you all something different, something special, something that involves me writing really long run-on sentences to introduce, something you have probably already figured out, before I even get to, that this is obviously, as you can see, and deduce from the title of this post, some big teeth, my teeth actually (though maybe the colors are pushed a bit, I hope my teeth aren't that yellow anyway), so there you have it, this stupid-ass sentence, and this painting.

See, teeth, I went pretty far into pure concept for this one. I hope you can wrap your heads around it, my head is wrapped around those teeth, well, my head is wrapped around teeth for which this painting is but a simulacrum, but you know, sort of like having my head wrapped around it, them, or whatever.

It's acrylic. It's on clayboard. It's 8 inches square.

Later dudes.

Laser

This my laser. it is an exciting laser in a box. an empty box. Like a box should be. Not full of possibilities. Not full of the stuff dreams are made of. not full of memories or good intentions or marshmallow fluff. Full of nothing. Delicious, flavorless nothing. The perfect place for a laser to hang out, or do whatever it is lasers do in boxes full of nothing.

hate bit I guess...

Y'all know I play video games. What y'all might not know, is I mostly hated video games as a child. Sure I had an NES and all my friends did too, but I detested that gray plastic box. It was fucking dumb. Give me a box of legos or a field with a big pile of dirt and I was set. Now, there were a few games in my youth I did enjoy. There was a car game called Street Rod. It was the best, I always beat the dumb black corvette. Oh and I played Red Baron and decimated everyone in a virtual WWI. And there was links and tie fighter and solitaire and the monkeys throwing the banana game....

But really, I didn't get into games until college, sort of. And blah, blah, blah. Point being, no game spoke to me. SO I tried to paint solitaire and got bored. Then I tried to paint duck hunt and realized I didn't care. So I made this speed-painting of Manny Calavera and his buddy Glottis from one of the only games I played more than once: Grim Fandango!



Find it and play it if you never did, it's swell.

Bunny Box, eh...

Considering I live with a surly bunny who spends way more time crapping in a box than any animal has a right, I have to say, making a bunny box themed image was not what I would call a natural process for me. I probably should have gone with my gut instinct and made a bunny sitting on a mountain of poo in a box, but really, haven't I poo'd this place up enough? So I made two other things. Both are dumb. Enjoy!


This one is bunnies in a box. Where they belong. And the box was labeled by a poor speller. Probably a bunny. Stupid bunnies.


Here is a boxy looking bunny sitting in another box. Very post-modern, or something...

Eh, quantity over quality that's what I always say. That and indeed. I say that a lot too. And that too. And too too. as well. also. yes.

p.s. see how I used texture to mask my laziness? I'm not supposed to point that out.

Fat Bird: The Game!!

This is inspired by Foie gras.

LDK Fan Art: Pre Pre Prequel

So, I couldn't resist (plus I have nothing better to do at work on the eve of christmas). So I decided I would show the tale of how the LDK got the K in his name.

At the start of this stirring tale he is just Little. But the End, a Little King, soon to get his shoes and become the Little Dancing King. Now the real question is, how did he get so damn little?!


Click to view bigger!!

He has a crown, he must be a king...

Sorry that this old guy is fully clothed, reasonably dry, and lacking any good dangling bits. Clearly I am suffering some effects of jet lag. I apologize.


Painted in the good ol' photoshop

Special Treat: Mixed Veggies

Chris Crammer and myself made this beautiful work via the magic of the internet. It tells a stirring tale of giving, sharring, wanting, and a proper diet all wrapped into a package of good fashion sense and in-style hair. Enjoy, please:


"Mixed Veggies"
(if you click it you can go so a slightly larger version on the flickr)

<3 Jesse and <3 Chris (probably)

OK, my real entry.

This guy's boo-boo: Having his face scraped off. But he seems OK with it, so it's all good. No worries.


**Boring back story: I started this forever ago. It was a test on clayboard. I discovered clayboard is not for me, at all. I might hate it. So I started this and said to myself, 'Clayboard is dumb. Eff this.' So it sat for months. Until tonight. I decided I wanted to finish it. It occurred to me it was fitting for Halloween, this challenge, and me sticking it to those jerks* in the clayboard industry.

Later.
Jesse

*They're probably not really jerks. I am sure there are lots of nice friendly people who work in the clayboard industry.

BOOB...?

I was staring at this title a long time trying to figure out what it said. Then I noticed Adam forgot the final period of the ellipses. So I fixed it.

I don't care...

...if it is a man, a woman, or something else, but damn, fishnets look good on everything.



I also have more proof of the ambiguity of the lovely Chris Crammer:

*In my defense this was by request by an unnamed party. I probably would have done it any way though...

We got a floater...

The other day I was standing on the subway platform when I reached for my book. I was momentarilly distracted by some people in shiny orange vests sitting over yonder, I took and gander and saw they were asunder. Upon further inspection it was evdient they were ridding the system of an asbestos infection. So I was not paying attention and my poor book slipped from my pearly paws and bounced tither and hither and landed amongst the tracks below:



And upon the realization all pronounced the day won.

I don't like flowers

But man, do I love flour. Delicious, powdery flour. This guy loves flour too. He loves it so much he lives in it. He loves it so much it is a true dilemma. The dilemma being that his very presence taints the flour and ruins its decadent purity. This guy, in fact, is a jerk. A stupid flour-stomping jerk.

A junk robot or robot junk?!

This is half for Adam and his birthday. This is half for Lindsay. This is also half for everyone else. It's got an inexhaustible number of halves.



This is a robot for the following reasons:

• Lots of right angles
• Tubes for limbs
• No nose
• Wiener
  

This is retro for the following reasons:

• Yellowed like grandpa's teeth
• No pants like all those damn dirty hippies
• Arms raised to avoid getting attacked by the riot police
• Badly drawn

This is applicable for a birthday for the following reasons:

• Wiener
  

Later dudes.

Jesse

Sins are dumb.

I think it might be a sin to sit around and paint on a Friday night. I should be getting my party on or something... Whatever.


Um, so this is my painting. Which I painted tonight, on a Friday. It doesn't apply to the topic at all really. Which I guess is me being a contrary butt-face. But last I checked being a contrary butt-face is not technically a sin, though maybe I should call the pope to confirm. But, as I always say, 'If the pope is infallible, then so am I." So I don't need to ask him, because I say its not a sin, so its not a sin. OK? Perfect. Speaking of which, I couldn't do this for reals even if I wanted too. I am perfect and without sin, and no that's not vanity, see the previous statement about my infallibility. Look it up. And I also don't think being self delusional is a sin either. Not that I am self delusional, but if I was I'd be in the clear anyway.

It's little, on paper, and it's paint.

Later,
Jesse